It's Potty Time!

Had fun in the public restrooms at school today. Normally I wouldn't talk about such things, but it's a choice between that and the pics of pressure ulcers we saw today. Egads! Restrooms, it is.

Anyhoo, for my first incident of the day, I walked into what I like to call the "Party Potty"-you know, the handicapped stall, where you just get a scosh more breathing room. But as I attempted to go in, a kindly fellow student warned, "Hey, there's no tissue in there!" Not wanting to be like Elaine on Seinfeld, begging someone to "spare a square", I went into the adjacent stall instead. No prob.

Later, after lunch, I saw a girl that I knew from CPR class waiting in the bathroom, even though there was an open stall. I asked if she was waiting to use the stall, but no, she was just waiting. I assumed it was for a friend. I took the available stall, then heard this chick say, "No, you didn't take it from me. I just didn't want to have to clean up someone else's tinkle on the seat."

Come again? You couldn't have told me that was the reason for your loitering BEFORE I sat down?!?

As I stood up, I felt that, indeed, there had been tinkle lying in wait for my thighs to wipe it up like a big sheet of Bounty. What a wench.

So those are my Postcards from the Potty for the day. The moral of the stories is: Wipe Before And After. You can thank me later.